Many many years ago, when I lived in LA, it was common to have at least one trip a year to Disneyland. This could be through school or the church youth group, but as children we were set loose in the Happiest Place on Earth and expected to fend for ourselves (under the supervision of a non-parent adult). Since these trips took all day, we had to have a way of procuring nourishment, so my parents would give me $20 to cover the lunch and dinner. Sometimes this would be augmented with a packed lunch/snack of Spam Musubi.
Now, most of the other kids also got around $20. And they'd happily spend it all and a little of their saved allowance on little snacks and meals with sodas in the park. Some would be careful with their cash and keep any spare leftover money. I only spent around $10-$15 and gave the rest back to my parents.
Even as a young child I was extremely careful with money. It was a precious commodity, one that I got sparingly. I was instilled very early with the concept of saving. Doing the simple math calculations in grade school of Principle and Interest made me realize small amounts, if invested over time, could yield delayed gratification. Since all of my basic needs were taken care of, I saw no reason to splurge on much else and could save away the rest.
As I've grown older, a few things have changed. I know more about economics, inflation, returns on investments, and so on. But some things don't change. I continue to live frugally and minimize large purchases. Many people have heard me comment about how I really "need" a new car, or a keyboard, or a new bike. Some will raise an eyebrow and go "just run what you have into the ground." I will then respond that my car is 19 years old with original parts and a cracked CV boot that will seize any month now. Or that I've been riding the same undersized bike for over 6-7 years. When I say I "need" something, I'll end up "needing" it for a year before I finally get around to getting something new. Heck, my computer had at least 3 almost-failing parts. I moaned that I needed to replace it for almost a year. The only reason I got a new one was the old one finally broke and it wasn't worth it to find what broke out of the several parts I knew were already failing.
Even for the little things I check if there's a way to reduce expenses. When I lived alone I wouldn't run the heat except for a few minutes a day in the winter (I got tired of waking up in a 55F room), and didn't run the A/C lower than around 85 in the summer. Too cold? Just wear more layers! If I want, I can live off around $25 worth of groceries a week for all 3 meals, and I gain cooking skills to boot. I bike to work not just for a bit of exercise, but also to save just a touch on gas.
What do I do with all these savings? Obviously hoard it away like Scrooge!
Seriously though, I do save a lot away. Some into retirement accounts, other sums into safety nets, and still more for future investments like a house eventually. But most of all I save up so I can give it away. I have developed enough of a buffer I have no problems with getting the short end of the stick when it comes to a bill amongst friends. If someone is in need I can help bail them out. I support my local ministries and charities. It's really liberating to not have to check if I will be able to eat next month if I splurge on a donation. Because I know I save more than I need.
Obviously in my current state I'm a bit blessed with my job. But it wasn't long ago I was scraping things together on just a TA's salary in grad school. Without any spending I had at most $100 spare each month after bills. Oddly enough, I'm even more careful about some things now that I have a better source of income.
I'm frugal. I love money and managing it and watching my savings grow. But I don't live deprived, and I'm not a penny pincher who lives for more money. I save to protect myself, and to enable freedom when it comes to supporting and blessing others.
If you're interested in frugality, I recommend reading this blog. Guy retired at around 35 and is living a comfortable middle-class life since.
Friday, February 10, 2012
Monday, February 6, 2012
About Me: Self-Improvement
When you look around the dating scene, often times people will ask "what's your type?" Most will respond with a laundry list of parameters of their ideal mate, and specific red flags of people they won't mesh with at all. Then people will follow through with several stories about who would and wouldn't work, or that one time with the really bad date who wasn't up to snuff.
I do have a relatively small, lax list for my requirements (it's mildly tongue-in-cheek at the start), but that's not the point of this post. What I wanted to talk about here is turning those lists back on to yourself.
Many times behind closed doors people will complain about how silly those other people are. You know the ones. Those who think it's always everyone else's fault. It's their fault they didn't have the backbone to ask you out. Why is everyone around me such jerks? How could you be so stupid to miss that detail and ruin our whole project! I'm pretty sure you're one of these complainers. I know I often complain about everyone else. But how often do you look at yourself and wonder if it's your fault? That perhaps if you were a little different, perhaps if you explained things better, perhaps if you were more caring things could work out better?
This is the kind of evaluation I'm talking about. Here's a quick example.
I often play online games with some friends. We learned these games in college, and have since progressed to a modicum of competency. Since we play on the same team, we share the awesome victories and gripe about the defeats. I will say I am definitely the weakest player on our team at this point. And many times I end up being the weak link that loses us the game because I didn't play my character properly or I lost our lane or I didn't save our more important teammates when I was supposed to. But heck, I've been playing this game for over 6 years! I'm relatively competent! It was just that our opponents were too good! It's because they came and put so much pressure on us, there was nothing I could do! It's not all MY fault. Right?
Sounds nice. Maybe helps ease my ego and the fact I let down my team. But it's not the truth. The truth is most of the time I screw it up. And I continue to lag as the rest get better because I don't put in the time to learn from better players, to follow the latest trends in the game, and increase my skills.
As an aside: that's not to say my teammates should have free reign at pointing out every single instance I screwed up. After all, if it's my fault, I should get all the blame and every pointer to expose every time I messed it up so I can learn and do better next time. Right? Well, perhaps, but please do it with some compassion. I know in my head it's my fault already, no need to kick me while I'm down.
Let's bring it back to dating.
Everyone has their list of wants. But how many people evaluate how well they fit others' lists? Can you say that you're caring? That you're honest and trusting? Will to put the others' needs above your own? Are you interested in investing into their lives? Or are you just a giant vacuum of wants and needs and only interested in locking in a wonderful prize who will serve you and make your life complete? Do you measure up to your own list of credentials you want in your dating partner?
I'm not saying go out and remake yourself. Being someone you're not just to attract your imaginary perfect ideal person can make you miserable as you try to maintain the lie. Unless you do it enough it becomes who you are. But that's a whole other can of worms on whether people can change or not.
Anyways, I've rambled on enough here. Point being, don't be that person who just gripes about everyone else. Take a few moments every now and then and apply your list of positive and negatives to yourself and see how you stack up. And be honest. You know you're not perfect, I know I'm not perfect, so find some stuff to improve on and become a little bit more the person you want to be around.
I do have a relatively small, lax list for my requirements (it's mildly tongue-in-cheek at the start), but that's not the point of this post. What I wanted to talk about here is turning those lists back on to yourself.
Many times behind closed doors people will complain about how silly those other people are. You know the ones. Those who think it's always everyone else's fault. It's their fault they didn't have the backbone to ask you out. Why is everyone around me such jerks? How could you be so stupid to miss that detail and ruin our whole project! I'm pretty sure you're one of these complainers. I know I often complain about everyone else. But how often do you look at yourself and wonder if it's your fault? That perhaps if you were a little different, perhaps if you explained things better, perhaps if you were more caring things could work out better?
This is the kind of evaluation I'm talking about. Here's a quick example.
I often play online games with some friends. We learned these games in college, and have since progressed to a modicum of competency. Since we play on the same team, we share the awesome victories and gripe about the defeats. I will say I am definitely the weakest player on our team at this point. And many times I end up being the weak link that loses us the game because I didn't play my character properly or I lost our lane or I didn't save our more important teammates when I was supposed to. But heck, I've been playing this game for over 6 years! I'm relatively competent! It was just that our opponents were too good! It's because they came and put so much pressure on us, there was nothing I could do! It's not all MY fault. Right?
Sounds nice. Maybe helps ease my ego and the fact I let down my team. But it's not the truth. The truth is most of the time I screw it up. And I continue to lag as the rest get better because I don't put in the time to learn from better players, to follow the latest trends in the game, and increase my skills.
As an aside: that's not to say my teammates should have free reign at pointing out every single instance I screwed up. After all, if it's my fault, I should get all the blame and every pointer to expose every time I messed it up so I can learn and do better next time. Right? Well, perhaps, but please do it with some compassion. I know in my head it's my fault already, no need to kick me while I'm down.
Let's bring it back to dating.
Everyone has their list of wants. But how many people evaluate how well they fit others' lists? Can you say that you're caring? That you're honest and trusting? Will to put the others' needs above your own? Are you interested in investing into their lives? Or are you just a giant vacuum of wants and needs and only interested in locking in a wonderful prize who will serve you and make your life complete? Do you measure up to your own list of credentials you want in your dating partner?
I'm not saying go out and remake yourself. Being someone you're not just to attract your imaginary perfect ideal person can make you miserable as you try to maintain the lie. Unless you do it enough it becomes who you are. But that's a whole other can of worms on whether people can change or not.
Anyways, I've rambled on enough here. Point being, don't be that person who just gripes about everyone else. Take a few moments every now and then and apply your list of positive and negatives to yourself and see how you stack up. And be honest. You know you're not perfect, I know I'm not perfect, so find some stuff to improve on and become a little bit more the person you want to be around.
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
The Many Sides of Trevin
Resting: Trigger - being sleepy. Typically can be seen during the night, in bed, in the natural environment of blankets and pillows. Tends to occur once a day. Lasts for hours.
Funny: Trigger - people having fun. Sometimes mistaken for being rude due to interspersion of sarcasm and deadpan snarking. Very popular state during large group events. Characterized by smiles and a weird glint in the eyes. Signs vary from being a very vocal to a quiet with quick interjections state. Goofy facial expressions may be involved. Sporadic and very contextual in frequency. Lasts for minutes to hours.
Thoughtful: Trigger - serious business. Seen in a variety of habitats including work, school, Bible Study, and when approached for advice. Looks at the long term gains instead of short-term. Rarely smiles, and vocabulary switches to verbose language, as well as detailed explanation and revisions clarifying previous points. Seen at least once a day, if not several times per day. Lasts for minutes to hours.
Gaming: Trigger - playing games. Seen only in a very localized region surrounding gaming mediums, be it computers, board games, card games, or word games. Will often play-to-win unless playing-to-make-sure-everyone-has-fun. Latter state is the default unless serious other play-to-win avatars are present. Often involves excited chatter, exaggerated movements, and heightened awareness both in audio and visual perception. Very fast reflexes. A relatively endangered siting, happening at most a few times per week. Lasts for minutes at a time.
Emo: Trigger - feeling alone. Seen in the setting of a car or empty room. Often as a result of either not enough social interaction or being surrounded by happiness and not connecting with said happiness. Thoughts tend to race to self-improvement and desire for deep relationships. Also may induce lengthy blog posts or philosophical ramblings. Often seen at least twice a week. Lasts for hours.
Cooking: Trigger - out of food to eat. Localized to the kitchen region. Often associated with sharp objects and high heat. Can never cook only one serving, except for breakfast. Regularly head is shaken when something is mistimed or forgotten. Exudes control over environment and then relaxes control to allow the natural flow. Seen once a week. Lasts for an hour.
Managing/Planning: Trigger - something to be planned. Also covers acquisitions. Details will be hunted down and shot. Scheduling will involve many buffer zones to ensure adequate time and minimal indigestion from nerves. Optimization is pursued. Often coupled with Thoughtful state. Portrays outward ease and complacency. No matter how long in this state, will always regret the minor details that didn't go as planned. Seen sporadically. Lasts for hours.
Nervous: Trigger - unknown and new situations. Outward appearances of darting eyes, sweating, and sometimes shaky hands. A more recent sighting as pressures grew to perform to now noticed expectations. Associated with intense situations where insufficient Planning preceded. Performances are strong triggers. Postmortem is avatar state was not required. Seen sporadically. Lasts for hours or until situation is resolved.
Masked: Trigger- default avatar. Intentionally recognizing and ignoring certain norms, perceptions, misconceptions, and stylistic nuances. Outward appearance often conflated with Thoughtful and Funny. Seen several times a day. Lasts for hours.
Funny: Trigger - people having fun. Sometimes mistaken for being rude due to interspersion of sarcasm and deadpan snarking. Very popular state during large group events. Characterized by smiles and a weird glint in the eyes. Signs vary from being a very vocal to a quiet with quick interjections state. Goofy facial expressions may be involved. Sporadic and very contextual in frequency. Lasts for minutes to hours.
Thoughtful: Trigger - serious business. Seen in a variety of habitats including work, school, Bible Study, and when approached for advice. Looks at the long term gains instead of short-term. Rarely smiles, and vocabulary switches to verbose language, as well as detailed explanation and revisions clarifying previous points. Seen at least once a day, if not several times per day. Lasts for minutes to hours.
Gaming: Trigger - playing games. Seen only in a very localized region surrounding gaming mediums, be it computers, board games, card games, or word games. Will often play-to-win unless playing-to-make-sure-everyone-has-fun. Latter state is the default unless serious other play-to-win avatars are present. Often involves excited chatter, exaggerated movements, and heightened awareness both in audio and visual perception. Very fast reflexes. A relatively endangered siting, happening at most a few times per week. Lasts for minutes at a time.
Emo: Trigger - feeling alone. Seen in the setting of a car or empty room. Often as a result of either not enough social interaction or being surrounded by happiness and not connecting with said happiness. Thoughts tend to race to self-improvement and desire for deep relationships. Also may induce lengthy blog posts or philosophical ramblings. Often seen at least twice a week. Lasts for hours.
Cooking: Trigger - out of food to eat. Localized to the kitchen region. Often associated with sharp objects and high heat. Can never cook only one serving, except for breakfast. Regularly head is shaken when something is mistimed or forgotten. Exudes control over environment and then relaxes control to allow the natural flow. Seen once a week. Lasts for an hour.
Managing/Planning: Trigger - something to be planned. Also covers acquisitions. Details will be hunted down and shot. Scheduling will involve many buffer zones to ensure adequate time and minimal indigestion from nerves. Optimization is pursued. Often coupled with Thoughtful state. Portrays outward ease and complacency. No matter how long in this state, will always regret the minor details that didn't go as planned. Seen sporadically. Lasts for hours.
Nervous: Trigger - unknown and new situations. Outward appearances of darting eyes, sweating, and sometimes shaky hands. A more recent sighting as pressures grew to perform to now noticed expectations. Associated with intense situations where insufficient Planning preceded. Performances are strong triggers. Postmortem is avatar state was not required. Seen sporadically. Lasts for hours or until situation is resolved.
Masked: Trigger- default avatar. Intentionally recognizing and ignoring certain norms, perceptions, misconceptions, and stylistic nuances. Outward appearance often conflated with Thoughtful and Funny. Seen several times a day. Lasts for hours.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Year in Review
Yay! Yet another year and my life hasn't gone pear-shaped!
Since everyone else seems to be doing it, thought I'd jot down a few of the important things that have (and haven't) happened this year.
Since everyone else seems to be doing it, thought I'd jot down a few of the important things that have (and haven't) happened this year.
- Got a real job! Yay positive income! Still learning the ropes and begging those around me for help on a nearly daily basis, but in theory, eventually, I'll have mastery over the work. At least that's what they tell me. And I trust my managers/elders.
- Moved to Folsom! Kinda stunk in that I can't keep up as well with all the awesome people I knew in Davis (miss you Catalyst people!). Sure we have Facebook and IM, but it's not the same as seeing them on a weekly basis and hanging out and catching up. On the other hand, I've been getting to know some new awesome people around here as well. Major shout-out to the people at Fusion for making me feel welcome, plus the crew at work for all the fun we've had and will have.
- Graduation with a Masters. DING. To be honest, I don't feel like I learned all that much from the extra school except how stupid I can be and how sometimes painful the academia system can be. Granted, without it I probably wouldn't have a job and I wouldn't have had the personal growth I had while in Davis, but academically Mudd was far superior in terms of shoveling awesome knowledge into me. Still, learned lots of random things.
- Moving is funsies. Dealing with stupid things like setting up internet and moving giant pieces of furniture? Not as much.
- Got to travel to MLG, see some awesome StarCraft live, meetup with Sean and Kevin, good times. Also, hilarious singing on the drive back. Bonus points to Derick for setting it all up.
- Wedding! Car rides going up and down! Driving! ON A BOAT!
- Wedding! Barns on fire! Seeing Davis buddies! Family!
- I continue my saga of becoming more awesome since I don't have to spend time (nor money) on a girlfriend.
- Napa trip. Tasting wines. Steph really, really can't hold her liquor. Also, I hate stiff brakes. Introducing Dominion (mwahahah more addicts!). Karaoke.
- 4th of July in Vegas. Seeing some awesome shows, doing some hanging around, making a little money on the tables.
- Not enough game nights. Realizing how much I've switched from a producer to a consumer, and a pretty poor consumer at that.
- LAN Parties.
- Lots and lots of late-night talks. Politics. People. Dancing. Game design and strategy.
- Bible Studies! Both learning to lead one properly and participating in an awesome one.
- Running lots of A/V. Playing lots of music. Except that's not happening as much anymore. Sad face.
- Cooking.
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Why I like Stories
Warning, this will start a little emo and get better later.
I've been feeling a little recently. There's plenty of factors, and I won't get into them here. But suffice to say I've been not as chipper as during the Spring.
However, I've noticed there are a few things I enjoy and can really lift my mood. One is social interaction, and thank God I've found things to keep me busy there. The other is reading stories. This can be going through the archive of one of my webcomics (another post on those eventually) or something like don't take it personally, babe, it just ain't your story. It's a quick little visual novel game, meaning you read some dialogue and every now and then are prompted with decisions to make. Some are minor, and some can drastically change the overarching story. The core though is you're reading a narrative and can slightly tweak things, but you're not actually in control since... well... it just ain't your story.
This fascination with stories isn't just a recent thing. I still remember how drawn I was to stories as a kid. Any story would do. For a while my sister had gotten a magazine series called Cricket, and I could spend hours or even days being absorbed in the various stories told through the archive of issues we had. I gobbled up the Lord of the Rings Trilogy in the span of a few days. If given the opportunity, I will read over 500 pages a day, or however long the particular book is I'm reading. This actually has forced me to NOT buy books or else every piece of spare time I had would be absorbed into them. And a decent chunk of time that wasn't free.
I'm even a sucker for most semblances of a plot. On more than one occasion have I had to tear myself away from a really poor piece after getting seriously plot committed. The plot was a complete wreck as was everything else, but I felt an obligation to finish it. I had to know what happened to these characters.
And I think therin lies the crux of the matter. Stories, overall, are a well-structured description of what is going on. They aren't as messy or complicated as real life. Even when things get really, really rough you subconsciously take comfort in the fact that there was an author to all of this and the ending will be what they designed it to be. It's the solace that at the end of the day everything will tie itself up in a neat bow. Or at least to what the author intended. It's that glimpse of hope, that at the end of the day things work out and all the uncertainty and worry was mostly for naught that really speaks to me. Even with the downer endings the ride is worth it. Being able to see things through a different lens, to cheer on your favorite character or get frustrated by an obvious trap. But most of all to be able to step into a world where things are under control and will work out to their appointed endings.
Sure you could call me a weakling who can't face the harsh realities of life. The uncertainty of what you're doing, how things will end, and that you can't skip to the good part is something you're just supposed to deal with. The grim trudge of time, the broken lives scattered around you, and the brevity of your life in the grand scheme of things are supposed to galvanize you, or at least temper your spirit. Worrying is good, it makes you do better. If you can't face the reality of the world, then have fun in your little escapist fantasy wasting away while I go forth and conquer the world and look down upon your little hidey-hole. Real badasses charge the frontline. Right?
Still, I like my stories.
I've been feeling a little recently. There's plenty of factors, and I won't get into them here. But suffice to say I've been not as chipper as during the Spring.
However, I've noticed there are a few things I enjoy and can really lift my mood. One is social interaction, and thank God I've found things to keep me busy there. The other is reading stories. This can be going through the archive of one of my webcomics (another post on those eventually) or something like don't take it personally, babe, it just ain't your story. It's a quick little visual novel game, meaning you read some dialogue and every now and then are prompted with decisions to make. Some are minor, and some can drastically change the overarching story. The core though is you're reading a narrative and can slightly tweak things, but you're not actually in control since... well... it just ain't your story.
This fascination with stories isn't just a recent thing. I still remember how drawn I was to stories as a kid. Any story would do. For a while my sister had gotten a magazine series called Cricket, and I could spend hours or even days being absorbed in the various stories told through the archive of issues we had. I gobbled up the Lord of the Rings Trilogy in the span of a few days. If given the opportunity, I will read over 500 pages a day, or however long the particular book is I'm reading. This actually has forced me to NOT buy books or else every piece of spare time I had would be absorbed into them. And a decent chunk of time that wasn't free.
I'm even a sucker for most semblances of a plot. On more than one occasion have I had to tear myself away from a really poor piece after getting seriously plot committed. The plot was a complete wreck as was everything else, but I felt an obligation to finish it. I had to know what happened to these characters.
And I think therin lies the crux of the matter. Stories, overall, are a well-structured description of what is going on. They aren't as messy or complicated as real life. Even when things get really, really rough you subconsciously take comfort in the fact that there was an author to all of this and the ending will be what they designed it to be. It's the solace that at the end of the day everything will tie itself up in a neat bow. Or at least to what the author intended. It's that glimpse of hope, that at the end of the day things work out and all the uncertainty and worry was mostly for naught that really speaks to me. Even with the downer endings the ride is worth it. Being able to see things through a different lens, to cheer on your favorite character or get frustrated by an obvious trap. But most of all to be able to step into a world where things are under control and will work out to their appointed endings.
Sure you could call me a weakling who can't face the harsh realities of life. The uncertainty of what you're doing, how things will end, and that you can't skip to the good part is something you're just supposed to deal with. The grim trudge of time, the broken lives scattered around you, and the brevity of your life in the grand scheme of things are supposed to galvanize you, or at least temper your spirit. Worrying is good, it makes you do better. If you can't face the reality of the world, then have fun in your little escapist fantasy wasting away while I go forth and conquer the world and look down upon your little hidey-hole. Real badasses charge the frontline. Right?
Still, I like my stories.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Thankful
In the spirit of the season, quick list of things I'm thankful for.
Family: We're not a picture perfect family, but it's always nice to be at home and hang with the family. And the fact we're all still around, even if some of use are spread out, is a really special thing as well. It's the fact that these people have known me all my life and still can put up with me that gives me hope.
Friends: Over the years I've accumulated a few of these. And this is beyond just "acquaintances" or people I "know," for which I feel extremely fortunate. Granted, I'm pretty thankful for those people as well, and potentially some of these will reach the inner circle eventually. It's just I'm super duper thankful people who aren't related by blood can stand me.
A Job: Thank goodness I've got one. No, it's not a dream job, but hey, can't argue at all with positive income.
Sanity: You'd be surprised how hard it is to get this stuff man. And to not waste the amount you have on hand.
Health: As much as I complain about my genes and lack of being a buff badass I'm relatively healthy. Which is awesome. It means when people say, "let go rock climbing " I can go "sure" and not freak out if my knees are going to give way. Or that I have to check various meals to make sure I don't swell up and die. Sure the bad eyesight and allergy meds I take every day are a hassle, but I ain't dead yet.
So yeah, life's not quite terrible. Also, food is tasty. And now to get some sleep, for which I'm extremely thankful for. Mostly 'cause I get quite the entertainment while sleeping. Seriously, my dreams are a combo of awesome and quality crazy.
Family: We're not a picture perfect family, but it's always nice to be at home and hang with the family. And the fact we're all still around, even if some of use are spread out, is a really special thing as well. It's the fact that these people have known me all my life and still can put up with me that gives me hope.
Friends: Over the years I've accumulated a few of these. And this is beyond just "acquaintances" or people I "know," for which I feel extremely fortunate. Granted, I'm pretty thankful for those people as well, and potentially some of these will reach the inner circle eventually. It's just I'm super duper thankful people who aren't related by blood can stand me.
A Job: Thank goodness I've got one. No, it's not a dream job, but hey, can't argue at all with positive income.
Sanity: You'd be surprised how hard it is to get this stuff man. And to not waste the amount you have on hand.
Health: As much as I complain about my genes and lack of being a buff badass I'm relatively healthy. Which is awesome. It means when people say, "let go rock climbing " I can go "sure" and not freak out if my knees are going to give way. Or that I have to check various meals to make sure I don't swell up and die. Sure the bad eyesight and allergy meds I take every day are a hassle, but I ain't dead yet.
So yeah, life's not quite terrible. Also, food is tasty. And now to get some sleep, for which I'm extremely thankful for. Mostly 'cause I get quite the entertainment while sleeping. Seriously, my dreams are a combo of awesome and quality crazy.
Saturday, October 15, 2011
A Wish
Man this thing is dusty.
Anyways, was thinking about what I would wish for if I had a wish. You know, like a genie or something like that popped out and decided to grant me a single wish. The typical story about how this would go is I'd wish for power, or fame, or money, and then it would either backfire or not be what I expected or something like that. Or I'd be selfless and wish for world peace and the world was a better place, or worse sometimes. Or there's the ones where it does come true and everything turns out well, like in Aladdin. For now, to keep tings simple, let's assume it all works out.
I oddly think I would choose to see what the world would be like without me, similar to in It's a Wonderful Life.
Perhaps it's a touch vain, but I think it would be really interesting to see what my life is worth. From my personal view, I don't myself causing huge swings in history. George Bailey in It's a Wonderful Life had some remarkable events in his life, such as saving his brother's life and how he dealt with his boss Mr. Gower the druggist. I don't think I've had that kind of impact in history. And from what I can tell I haven't changed people's lives drastically. Sure I've had a few rivals, some interesting friendships, and held positions of power and influence but all-in-all nothing terribly remarkable.
So, I wonder, what would the world be like without me? Would my absence have caused a butterfly effect ripple and many of my friends would be dead or vastly different? Or perhaps there would be differences but they were subtle, like a sibling chose a slightly different career or a friend holds a different religion.
Or, I wonder, would I have been simply replaced by others in people's lives and life went on without me.
It's quite the vain wish, to see how important your life was, and yet I still wonder.
Truthfully, what would you wish for?
Anyways, was thinking about what I would wish for if I had a wish. You know, like a genie or something like that popped out and decided to grant me a single wish. The typical story about how this would go is I'd wish for power, or fame, or money, and then it would either backfire or not be what I expected or something like that. Or I'd be selfless and wish for world peace and the world was a better place, or worse sometimes. Or there's the ones where it does come true and everything turns out well, like in Aladdin. For now, to keep tings simple, let's assume it all works out.
I oddly think I would choose to see what the world would be like without me, similar to in It's a Wonderful Life.
Perhaps it's a touch vain, but I think it would be really interesting to see what my life is worth. From my personal view, I don't myself causing huge swings in history. George Bailey in It's a Wonderful Life had some remarkable events in his life, such as saving his brother's life and how he dealt with his boss Mr. Gower the druggist. I don't think I've had that kind of impact in history. And from what I can tell I haven't changed people's lives drastically. Sure I've had a few rivals, some interesting friendships, and held positions of power and influence but all-in-all nothing terribly remarkable.
So, I wonder, what would the world be like without me? Would my absence have caused a butterfly effect ripple and many of my friends would be dead or vastly different? Or perhaps there would be differences but they were subtle, like a sibling chose a slightly different career or a friend holds a different religion.
Or, I wonder, would I have been simply replaced by others in people's lives and life went on without me.
It's quite the vain wish, to see how important your life was, and yet I still wonder.
Truthfully, what would you wish for?
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