Catalyst Retreat Write-up

Let's start at the beginning.

At the end of last week (i.e. Friday) I was very, very concerned. I had grading to do, homework, I was slated to run A/V when I got back from the retreat, and I hadn't prepared for the Bible Study I was in charge of for next week. Adding to the mix that most of my weekend would be involved with being in the mountains of Tahoe didn't exactly assuage my time management gremlin. Oh, and I was pretty sleep deprived at this point too.

I was in fact so worked up that I woke up on Thursday and Friday in physical pain. I blame my genetics from my mothers who has similar panic attacks hit. Perhaps the best way to explain it is as if all your stomach muscles decided they wanted to be really, really tight and commence to tie themselves into knots. It is discomforting to say the least.

The ride up was fairly uneventful. Rebecca (aka Becca) was driving, I was introduced to a new gal named Bethany, but I also had a headache and tried to get a bit of sleep. We listened to some music and Bill Cosby stand-ups once the conversation stalled, and due to stuff playing it never started up again. Note to self, if you want conversations, intentionally play background music in your ride.

We arrived a little early for dinner. Actually, dinner was running late. Turns out one of our ovens didn't work. Hard to cook pizzas that way. Joey was super excited that he now had a copy of Agricola, and wanted to teach a bunch of us. We never had everyone together to learn. By the end of the weekend, he only got to play 1 game that I know of, and it was only a 2-player game. Joey was kinda bummed.

That evening we had our first lesson in how to practice Lectio Divina. It's a method of Quiet Time based from the monastic periods of Europe. At its core it is about trying to meditate and listen for God to speak to you. Turns out this can be really, really hard. Being a Christian who has grown up in the church I have heard scores of sermons and lessons on nearly every topic and book in the Bible. So, I can easily latch onto a word or phrase that speaks to me, but then I start to connect it to other verses or sayings and try to determine a meaning and application right away. Nope. Lectio Divina involved meditating for a few minutes on just one thing, then waiting a few minutes in silence listening. We did it in a group setting this first evening, hearing Isaiah 55:8-13 being read while we sat in the dark with candles illuminating the room. I was struck by parts of the passage speaking about the authority of God and how His Word will do its purpose. In short, God is in control and can do anything. The real question is, why aren't you letting Him guide your life since He knows so much more and wants to give you the best life He can.

Free time that evening was mostly a bit of chatting. After we arranged sleeping quarters, making sure to have an open bed for Peter who was coming in late, we hit the sacks. Peter came in and work me up. Mind you, it didn't take much to wake me up. I was a bit wired and still freaking out a bit, so it was a very restless night.

Woke up the next day a tad early to help bake cinnamon rolls for breakfast. Remember, one oven is on the fritz. It also so happens this oven was in the girl's cabin, where meals were served. So, boy's cabin pitched in to help bake rolls early in the morn. I was pretty much in zombie mode.

Morning Lectio Divina is solo. I go outside and try to read a portion of Isaiah, but the wind flips the page. I end up reading that section instead (a portion of Isaiah 44:6-8). I am again struck by God's authority and power and strength. Sufficiency in Christ. I'm sensing a common thread. In fact, I even got a bit angry during this session going, "I already know this, tell me something I don't know!" The nagging in my head responds, "If you know so much, why aren't you living it out?"

From about 9am to 3:30pm we are put to manual labor. The cabins used to be privately owned, and people would store stuff under the cabins. However, the Fire Marshall isn't too happy about this. So, we have volunteered to help haul all this stuff down the hill. My first major task was climbing around in one of the cabins (#83) with Steph and yanking out all the wood and debris left in there over the years. Natalie was also aiding in the piling and hauling of our stuff. With all the loose dirt, my face mask was a nice dark hue by the end of it. I had a few panic attacks in the cramped spaces as I tried to stay scrunched down and balance myself, not from claustrophobia.

I then helped out for the rest of the day mostly hauling stuff down. Others were involved in handing things from basement to outside, hauling, and helping sort items. I was pretty tired by the end, and I'm sure everyone else was too. At the same time, we found some really neat stuff. Several very good conditions cots were recovered. We found several tools, and David even took home an ax we found. Lots of old fiberglass insulation. However, the bulk of the items were wood. Which, in some ways, is a good thing since it's Tahoe and you burn what you can get when it gets chilly. All my clothes from that period were dusty and grimy, so I took a shower and changed into another set.

Until dinner at 6pm it was free time. We had been lucky for the beginning of the day, but in the afternoon a light drizzle started up. Common things included trips down to the lake, playing random word games like the Catch Phrase Joey brought, and some music playing provided by Landon and Song-Shin (I think that's how you spell it). I managed to trudge through all of the grading I had brought. This elicited a few comments about TAs and how weird it was to think about me as a TA or how terrible it is that I actually care about the students when some of use don't care about the homework and just want to get it done.

Matt went fishing with Hannah. Hannah caught the biggest fish of the trip only using her Disney Princess pole.

Dinner was tasty pasta. Props to the cooks.

Evening session involved another group Lectio Divina session. This time the passage was on the passage about the vine and branches. Landon stole my main verse about branches being unable to produce fruit on their own, but I also was really into the part about how God prunes the branches that produce fruit. It means even if you're doing well, troubling times will come, but it isn't random punishment it is intended for growth and nourishment and refinement. Again, God meddling with my life for my own good. Dangit. I like having control of my life. I like to think I have it all together, that I'm executing my master plan on my own time, and it is my intellect that got me out of that sticky situation and solved that one annoying problem.

We do a few rounds of Sardines, then break into free time. Turns out the wood was producing too much smoke and the flue wasn't catching it all, so the second story of the girl's cabin was a bit... smoky. We also decked ourselves out in glowsticks and had a mini party. Then smores. Then a game called Families. I stunk at it. Then Beth taught us a Drama game called Tree. That was epic. Here are a few example scenes: A whale chasing Krill a la Nemo (Krill go Eeeeeeee!). Jiminy Cricket being squashed by someone. Dirt on a wall being cleaned. Jesus breaking bread (Sara cried out in pain as she was broken). A sidewalk, with a crack, with some gum in the crack. An angry mom asking why there is a keg in the house. Steph being rolled around as a dead fish by water. Danielle as a bouncer punching a minor trying to sneak into the club, and then getting attacked by the kid's mother. Pretty much epic.

I slept soundly that night.

Next morning was a light breakfast, individual Lectio Divina, some sharing, then clean-up. Rain was finally coming down in steady streams, making things a tad interesting. I am so thankful in my investment in water-proof hiking boots. They have served me so well over the years. Danielle and Bethany (newly minted awesome buddies just over the weekend) reveled in the rain singing Disney songs and standing on a rock. Photos were taken and we prepared to drive home.

On the way back we reverted back into playing Contact. Turns out Bethany has played and loves almost every party game ever, including Contact, the Cup Game, and many others. We played Contact from Tahoe all the way back to Davis. I lost a letter because I couldn't remember poinsettia. =p Also, the car almost overheated as we climbed the ridge. Once again props to Becca for driving mastery, even in the pouring rain.

Perhaps the most important part of the whole thing, besides hanging out and getting to know some truly awesome people, was realizing just how much God was in control. Or, rather, how much I should be relying on God being in control instead of trying to line it all up myself. It really took a weight off my life, and I'm quite sure everything will manage to work out and I won't crash on Wednesday and sleep the whole day away. 99% sure. But still, going into the retreat I was almost freaking out emotionally and physically. This came just at the right time to re-align me. Funny how God works sometimes.

Oh, and poor Joey and Peter and their inability to play games they wanted to play. Like Agricola and BANG! for Joey. Or Nerds for Peter. I kinda wanted to play Nerds. I'm guessing my dexterity is pretty crummy now though. I think this is why I don't typically try to organize games but will play pretty much any game others are playing.

This has been yet another gloriously poorly written brain dump while sleep deprived.